Mugshots Rewind: BUMP! 2011 Nightlife

Written by Robert Roth

Nobody does Halloween like Nark Magazine.

Nark has a great history with BUMP!, Gay City's long running, annual Halloween party benefit. In 2011, Nark and Amoania took the stage for an eye-catching performance to Hi-Fashion's "I Am Not Madonna", followed by an booty-shaking DJ set as Superthreat. For 2014, Superthreat returns to the DJ booth at Neighbours for BUMP's 31st year on Thursday, 10/30. It's always a great party, and it benefits a great organization. Gay City is the best place in town to get your unmentionables checked out before you start whipping them around the dance floor, after all.

Joining the daring duo is an amazing lineup of talent, including BenDeLaCreme (remember that she-wolf costume she wore last year?), Lady Bunny, Jimi Jaxon, and the witchy-witchy Markos Sisters. Put a little thought into your Halloween look and it might even win you a cool grand. For real.

Tickets for BUMP start at $30, but they go up at the door so get them in advance here.

Check out the pics from BUMP! 2011 from our very own Rachel Robinson.

The party doesn't stop with BUMP. On Friday 10.31 you'll need to get yourself down to the dirty bird for Dickslap Halloween Edition featuring none other than amateur undies model Kenny Brain from Big Brother Canada in all his bearded glory, along with Berlin-based DJ sensation La Fraicheur!

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Mugshots: Dickslap! w/ Dan & Terry 10.17.14 at The Eagle Nightlife

Written by Nark

The hits just keep on comin' week after week at The Eagle. Last Friday was one of our rowdiest slapping of the dicks ever! Dan Savage and Terry Miller had mens chained up to walls and tables and in cages, there was a line down the street of super cute people, Ozma and Brian tore it up and down again and the cage was furrier than ever. GOOD THING WE GET TO DO IT AGAIN on Halloween with monsieur KENNY BRAIN! Better get there early lads!

Join us tonight as well for our fall edition of FIERCE QUEEN, which queens are we gonna send packin?  



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Mugshots & Photobooth: Shade! 10.10.14 @ The Eagle Nightlife

Written by Nark

Shade you crazy. Sweaty. Squishy. And Crazy. I want to be your friend all the time, can we? Can we have benefits? Yes? I can photograph you over and over? Oh great, excellent. See you every 2nd Friday then I guess. 

Until our next rendezvous, why not come and look amazing at this stuff?

Roaming photos by Kevin Kauer / Nark -- Photobooth by Rachel Robinson 



Photobooth Below!


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Mugshots: sex.wav at The Mercury 10.02.14 Nightlife

Written by Nark


Your photos from this month's sex.wav have arrived, and you look so. damn. foine. Keep it up, and come look fine at these good lookin parties coming up, ok?


DO YOU WANNA BE THE NEXT FIERCE QUEEN? SIGN UP NOW TO PERFORM NEXT WEEK! Perform, get judged mercilessly, and win CASH! Sign up to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. !!

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Mugshots: Insert Coin! 10.04.14 at The Eagle Nightlife

Written by Nark

BUTTS. VIDEO GAMES. BUTTS. MARIO KART. BUTTS. There is nothing left to be said. Insert Coin is the sexiest place to be a deviant nerd. First Saturdays of the month at The Eagle!

Like this? Join us for some more BUTTS this Friday for DICKSLAP with Dan Savage and Terry! And Brian Maier. And Blaine. And Kyle. And Ozma. And YOU.



Photos by Rachel Robinson

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Nark Recommends: Cherdonna Shinatra in Worth My Salt Culture

Written by Robert Roth

Jody Kuehner, formerly part the Cherdonna and Lou show, has set out and her own and will soon be bringing us her first evening-length Cherdonna Shinatra show, Worth My Salt, starting Oct 17 at Velocity Dance Center.

Described as a mash up of Carl Sagan’s Cosmos and some serious female icons, including Kate Bush, Diane Keaton, and Marie Antoinette, the show will be looking at “the timely theme of gender inequity through the lens of an existential crisis.” It promises to be a visual spectacle, of course. Cherdonna’s outrageously poofy hair, relentlessly delightful personality, and obvious sense of childlike wonder will be paired costumes by Mark Mitchell and visuals by Salt Horse’s Corrie Befort.

“Enormity—it’s so insane, that we can just go about our day, like, whatever, space goes on forever; let’s get a coffee,” Kuehner was recently quoted as saying. “That kind of juxtaposition is hard for me. To not want to run around the world screaming my head off.”

It’s always an exciting time, watching Cherdonna teeter around stage, seemingly always about to collapse in a tangle of gangly limbs and enormous hair. Keuhner clearly has the dance chops to make such complicated choreography look effortless and amazing. Drag has always been an effective medium to talk about social justice, and so it seems natural that she takes the character beyond her cabaret roots into the realm of performance art.

The Cherdonna Show: Worth My Salt
Velocity Founders Theater // 1621 12th Ave
10/17–19, 10/24–26 // 8pm
TICKETS $20 / $25 at the door / $15 student + senior

You can also help fund this show by making a donation online here

You can also catch Keuhner, along with designer Mark Mitchell, at the upcoming Speakeasy series event The Art of Politics + The Politics of Queer Art Part 2 this coming Sunday, 10/5, at Velocity Dance Studio. There they will share their work, discussing the queer politics of art-making, in an interactive conversation over cocktails + canapés.


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Mugshots: sex.wav at The Mercury! 9.04.14 Nightlife

Written by Nark

Peruse below to check out the photos from this months sex.wav at The Mercury! Photos by Rachel Robinson

Don't forget to get your dance on with us tonight at Neumos for HERCULES AND LOVE AFFAIR!


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Summer's End from Futurewife Music

Written by Robert Roth

It’s fitting, as the Seattle days slip from summer into fall, that Futurewife (PYT, Brilliantine) and Sister Girlfriend have just released their collaborative track “Summer’s End”. Described by Futurewife as being “dedicated to the Indian Summer where that one ‘could have been’ left you wondering,” the song’s cool, poppy, disco groove perfectly captures the vibe of the waning summer season.

“I actually wrote the song last summer, and had Tiffany sing the backing chorus,” Futurewife told me, “but it wasn't until the fall that I found Sister Girlfriend. It seemed silly to release the track in winter, so I’ve been redefining and starting it over ever since.”

Like many tracks released by Futurewife, “Summer’s End” has a pared-down sound, strongly influenced by a disco vibe. It’s inherently accessible, and a welcome counterpoint to today’s proliferation of anthemic pop/rock and hip hop. The vocals, provided by Sister Girlfriend’s Ryan Batie, along with Tiffany Wan, sound clean and earnest. Batie’s lyrics evoke the feeling that many of us have at the end of a summer romance, when we’re not quite ready to let go of the warmth of summer’s embrace.

“When the cold is at the door,” sings Batie, “I don’t want to be alone.”

“I want to be your Summer’s End,” replies Wan.

The song even includes a sexy saxophone solo performed by Rob Hanlon, also of Sister Girlfriend, lending it a hot summer night feeling reminiscent of the Miami Vice soundtrack.



“Summer’s End” is currently available as a free download on the Futurewife Soundcloud page. Grab you copy now, and start reliving the memories of warm nights as you tuck yourselves in against the chill of the rainy Seattle fall.


You can enjoy more of Futurewife’s music sensibilities an an upcoming event he’s hosting this coming Friday. The Institution 003 happens Friday 9/26, from 10pm - 6am and features an amazing DJ lineup, including Karl Kling, John Barera, DJ Pavone, Joey Webb, and DJ M3. You’ll find all the details on the Facebook event page.

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Party Like a Cheap Trick With Good Taste This Weekend Nightlife

Written by Nark

So. This is the summer that never ends. Except, well, if you look outside it looks pretty over (THANK SHESUS), but that means nothing for your dancing feet. This last week of September is our magical festival send off, Decibel Festival, but since that isn't enough there's also like a bajillion really fun non-decibel parties as well. 

Seeing as this is my first year staying at Decibel instead of going to Folsom (oh except that year I worked at that club that shall not be named where Erykah Badu threw me SO much shade), I naturally wanted to do everything ever until my intestines fuse to the outside of my body through osmosis from perpetual dancing. BUT seeing as that is NOT a cute F/W 2015 look, I had to somewhat limit it down. 

So here are my top picks and or the stuff I am involved with, hopefully I will find myself dancing at each and every one, obviously there are about 200 other things that are amazing and happening as well, but these are just what WE hope to make it to!




Nark Magazine is so elated to be presenting a showcase with Decibel Festival again this year, and we are stoked to be butt2butt with Kim Ann Foxman again! This is a guaranteed rager, don't be left out!






I mean, life wouldn't be the same without a sexy romp at the Eagle now would it? So maybe if you get techno'd out you can come here for some bath house sleazy disco and heavy petting? For more information just divert your eyes into any direction, we are kinda advertising it a lot on this site if ya didn't see..



After you spend some time in the Eagle you might wanna spread your wings and fly, or at least your legs (FOR SOME EXTRA ROOM PEOPLE) and mosey yourself down to roll around on the floor in a giant warehouse. The Institution is sure to be pumpin, and if you want more info on this not so secret secret party, go check it out HERE.





The Matrixxman cometh, one beer if by land, two beers if by sea (hint it's by sea). Get your daytime boat booty popping on on this Decibel cruise, featuring Matrixxman, Young Marco and Deadbeat!

--Information and Tickets Here--



Do you think I could exist knowing the green and golden goddess fronted disco savants Midnight Magic are in town without seeing them? AND with all them other ho's on the flyer? No way. Front of line.




Sick and tired of clubs and concert venues and warehouses? Well Seattle has just the thing for you, go get shitty in a crazy ass maze of old train cars thats also a shitty ass Chinese restaurant and karaoke bar but is most CERTAINLY a ridiculously fun amazing wild trip of a time! The Train Car House Party is THE. FUNNEST. PARTY! (Unless you absolutely despise dancing and hate watching other people dance their faces off). Loves of our lives Erin O'Connor-Drew and Karl Kamakahi burn it up alongside Patrick Hernandez, and guess what, it's FREEEEE!


Phew, it's a good thing that are a million hours in a day, because I am REALLY stoked for this double-venue extravaganza. Tin Man is responsible for one of my favorite tracks of all time, where is it... oh here!

And so I owe it to him and myself to be falling down on the dancefloor as well, because by time he goes on I'm sure I'll have no idea where I am anymore but I'm going to LOVE it.

This is a Decibel Party that is oddly -not- a Decibel Party? Aka your wristband won't get you any special status here, so make sure you go buy a ticket!




SUNDAY (did you forget that we were STILL on Saturday?)


Shameless cares about you. They really do. They want you to know that after all that other stuff you did, that your bed, your apartment, your cat or dog needing food, NONE of that matters, because it's 6am and it's time to KEEP. DANCING. Come into the warm embrace of the Shameless bosom, get some breakfast in you, dance it off, repeat. 

More info over on the Shameless website..


Well, you're almost there y'all. Right about the time you can tell how many fingers I'm holding up, it'll be time to get your butt down to Rebar for Seattle's favorite house weekly turned Decibel rager, FLAMMABLE. You know the drill, above is the flyer in case you forgot how to act.





So this really big and amazing and awesome band called um... HERCULES AND LOVE AFFAIR... thought it was real cute to come in on MONDAY after one of our biggest weeks of the year, and you know what is even cuter? The fact that you are going to be there even if you are propped up like a fucking scarecrow on the dancefloor. Wave them straw arms girl. Hercules. Is. Everything.

Opening for them is some unknown trick named... ME, plus Bright Light Bright Light returns his magical scruffy face to us (while on his world tour with Elton John mind you), and Navid Izadi. 

This will be major. This will be sold out. You will not be left out by following this link to TICKETS.




Just kidding. Go back to work and start saving up for next year.

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Mugshots: Dickslap! 9.19.14 at The Eagle Nightlife

Written by Nark

Woo boy, there may have been a lot of tail down in San Francisco getting whipped around at Folsom, but we certainly kept it cute up here in the Northwest for Septembers Dickslap. At least I think so, right? It's all kind of fuzzy to me... well let's see the proof from Rachel Robinson's Photos!

Make sure to join us Friday night for Arf! And next month's Dickslap goes into kink overload with Dan Savage and Terry hosting, + Ozma Otacava, Brian Maier (SF, with his beau Kyle Krebs dancing in the cage), Blaine As(s)bury and more!

Oh, and this too 


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Introducing Arf! Dipping 10 Toes Deep Into Kink Nightlife

Written by Nark

Of course, any dip wouldn't be right without us making you relive that Sarah McLachlan video against your will, now would it?


Every day thousands of pups go without handlers, and deal with abusive daddies, will you help?


Introducing Arf!, a night of kink, fetish, bath house disco and sleazy dance tunes for the experienced gear pig down to the new and curious cub at The Eagle this Friday. Door discount in your favorite gear and a clothes check provided, so strap some things in and let other things just hang out and come take a dip in the puppy pile.


Last Fridays at The Eagle, Seattle
Opening 9.26.14 
w/ Bright Light Bright Light (UK) & Nark
Cage Pup Tyler Rush
Hosted by Zak the Barber & Pup Kai
$7 Cover, $5 in Gear

Facebook RSVP

Pup Cruelty from Nark Magazine on Vimeo.


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Photobooth: Shade! 9.12.14 at The Eagle Nightlife

Written by Nark

Opulence Queer Empire, Shade! Another fab night of next level queerocity at The Eagle, thanks to everyone for dancing and making it such a blast! Below are your photobooth photos from Rachel Robinson!



These very real things are happening over the next two weeks, don't miss out!

This Friday, Dickslap at The Eagle w/ Jens Irish (PDX) & Hellen Tragedy

Next Thursday 9/25 Decibel Festival showcase w/ Kim Ann Foxman and Clean Bandit at The Crocodile


Monday 9/29 Hercules and Love Affair Live! w/ Bright Light Bright Light & Navid Izadi at Neumos


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